African American Family Connection

Channel of Communication for the African American Community

It Takes Courage to Raise A Child

June 16, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under Kitchen Table Wisdom


airplane-father-and-son-600x300Happy Fathers Day

Every Day!

It’s all about Dad it our turn to celebrate the fathers and dads for being so vitally important to the strength and well-being of the family.

Without them we are missing something that cannot be replaced which transcends the boundaries statistical labels and stereotypes.

Today in the African American community the statistics are discouraging about fathers missing in action and also in the household. Family values are implanted through the strength of the father in the family unit.

Thankfully there are many men that do their absolute best when it comes to the being a role model and leader in the family. Not all families resemble a mom and dad living in the same household with their children. Some families are blended, some families live in separate homes and children shuffle back and forth to spend time with both parents.

These are the men that are not always acknowledged for their moral fiber and commitment to demonstrating a work ethic and teaching by example. They remind us that being a good father goes beyond statistics or societal labels.

Some parents can live apart in partnership and work together for the benefit of the child or any children they have. Separation does not have to mean drama and chaos for the children because the most important objective is the well-being of children.

Dad’s are working it out and doing their part to be available by setting up a household that provides the same or similar comforts the child would have at home with mom.

It is everyone’s responsibility to reduce the absence of fathers in the home by being supportive and patient. It takes courage to raise a child for anyone man or woman in these challenging economic times.

The report is spread over the airways that black men are not responsible, have negative attitudes and self destructive behavior.

The Spoken Word Blog;

In the black community, fatherhood is endangered and this crisis is one of the most important issues of this generation.

Unemployment leads to poverty and frustration which can lead to abuse or domestic violence, crime and incarceration. It resembles a domino effect for a child in this cycle which contributes to the struggle of single parent homes.

The statistics state that it is a social crisis in the black community that over fifty percent of households are women.

Not every child fails in a single parent household with an absent father; President Barack Obama stated during his campaign;

“I know what it means to have an absent father, although my circumstances weren’t as tough as they are for many young people today.”  “. . . We must also admit that programs alone can’t replace parents; that government can’t turn off the television and make a child do her homework; that fathers must take more responsibility for providing the love and guidance their children need .”

It takes courage to raise a child to be a father that instills family values positive character and confidence. Fathers show in our lives in our grand fathers, uncles, brothers and extended family members that provide male leadership.

Fathers, keep doing what you do because I am on your side. I raised my children with the help of my family. Their father was around just not in the same household and they all turned out as descent people.

Support is important, so let us all support fathers today and every day. They are a valuable source of strength in our community.

Happy Father’s Day to all dads!

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Judge Sotomayor – Shaped, not Defined by Ethnicity

June 6, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under Kitchen Table Wisdom


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Of course our heritage shapes our perspective, isn’t that what makes up the diversity of the world?  While skimming through the articles, sound bites and pouty commentary of the “talking heads” of the networks, I see the same scenario that has played out for decades since the origin of government.

A strong confident woman in a profession historically dominated by white males, Judge Sonia Sotomayor is described as domineering, demanding and exacting, with some lawyers over the years criticizing her as outspoken and temperamental on the bench because her demeanor is not the typical description of what role a woman holds in society.

Growing up in the South Bronx to a working class family in the Bronxdale Houses, a massive brick housing project with a diabetic condition requiring her to take insulin injections most of her childhood. What kind of demeanor would you have if your have been taking injections most of your life?

When we picture a housing development or projects as it is called, we imaging run down buildings with dark hallways that smell of urine and inhabited by drug dealing gang members. Most public housing was built in the 1940s, ’50s and ’60s, to provide a decent place to live for the working class family in a community with a sense of pride.

From the projects of the South Bronx to the dormitories of Princeton and Yale Law School is a stark contrast and a world apart, “I have spent my years since Princeton, while at law school and in my various professional jobs, not feeling completely a part of any of the worlds I inhabit.”

Next to her Princeton yearbook photo, she chose a quote from Norman Thomas, a prominent socialist who ran for president six times: “I am not a champion of lost causes, but of causes not yet won.”

Should judges decide cases purely on close readings of facts and law, excluding their own frames of reference?

“Our gender and national origins may and will make a difference in our judging,” Sotomayor told the audience at the University of California at Berkeley that day in October 2001. “Personal experiences affect the facts that judges choose to see. . . . I wonder whether by ignoring our differences as women or men of color we do a disservice both to the law and society.”

Driven by her own ambitions and unexpected great generational timing, Judge Sotomayor represented woman as an accomplished Latina lawyer during a time in our history when bureaucrats sought to diversify the white power structure by promoting more blacks, Latinos and women.

The following are a few comments about Judge Sonia Sotamayor from supporters and critics;

The Manhattan district attorney, Robert M. Morgenthau, who recruited her from Yale Law School, said the comforts of corporate law held no great attraction for her. And Ms. Sotomayor’s lifelong struggle with diabetes lent a sense of urgency.”It made her think, ‘I’m not going to be around forever, I have to keep moving,’ ” Mr. Morgenthau said. “I remember talking with her about how much time each day, about an hour, she spent giving herself shots of insulin.”

And Senator Imhofe (R) is concerned that she may not be able to resist the “undue influence” of her race and gender.  Is it like demon possession or something?  The goblin of Hispanic womanhood threatens to render her a hapless zombie conjuring from the spirit world glamours of quotas, hostile workplaces, and bilingual education.

The argument of conservative legal thinkers is that Sotomayor, is an able lawyer, but not “not that smart and kind of a bully on the bench,” as one former Second Circuit clerk for another judge put it. “She has an inflated opinion of herself, and is domineering during oral arguments, but her questions aren’t penetrating and don’t get to the heart of the issue.”

In 1995, for example, she issued an injunction against Major League Baseball owners, effectively ending a baseball strike that had become the longest work stoppage in professional sports history and had caused the cancellation of the World Series the previous fall. She was widely lauded for saving baseball. Climagesaude Lewis of the Philadelphia Inquirer wrote that by saving the season, Judge Sotomayor joined “the ranks of Joe DiMaggio, Willie Mays, Jackie Robinson and Ted Williams.”

Circuit judge Jose Cabranes, who would later become her colleague, put this point more charitably in a 1995 interview with The New York Times: “She is not intimidated or overwhelmed by the eminence or power or prestige of any party, or indeed of the media.”

Her life story represents the great promise of the American dream –

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What are you doing to prevent teen pregnancy?

May 14, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under Kitchen Table Wisdom


j0289531Young women are making the choice to become sexually active at an alarming rate and even more disturbing as young as age nine.

We live in a sexually charged society with messages of sexuality threaded into every media outlet possible and what is intended for adult entertainment is viewed by children and teenagers. Children and teens imitate what they see in popular culture.

Family values can have a positive impact on the choices that teens make when it comes to sexual activity.  Decoding the sound-bites and image for teens is important.  Watch what they watch and listen to what they say about it. Don’t think they are not exposed, everyone is exposed.

How can a young person make a decision to not become sexually active when the images they see daily and hear in music, commercials and advertisements say that to be accepted, popular and beautiful you must be sexually attractive?

Puberty is age 7 to 11 when girls and boys are shaking off the identity that has been defined by their connection to parents and family group.  Innocence fades, the magical begins to disappear and they begin to identify with their own responses by the defining themselves through their connection with others outside of the family group.

The magical way that children think up to age seven begin to disappear or overshadowed by the biological changes in the body from puberty to the state adolescence. The old saying in the black community “you are smellin’ yourself” means that you are attempting to act in grown up ways when your are still just a child that does not understand grown up things.

I watch the six-graders on the playground at my grand-daughter’s school kiss, touch and grope each other with not attempt to hide it. They are very interested in sexual activity or at least what they can get away while waiting to be picked up by mom or dad. The parents stop and blow their horn, they seem to be pre-occupied and never notice the huddles in the corner.

We are in a desperate situation with teen pregnancy in the African American community. In a recent article on Black America Web it was stated that the United States has the highest rates of teen pregnancy and birth in the entire developed world and that 3 in 10 girls will get pregnant at least once by age 20?

How man young women do you know personally that has gotten pregnant before their 20th birthday?

This is everyone’s problem and we all must get involved actively to advocate abstinence and caution. Mothers and fathers need to talk to their teens about the critical time to make the right decision before they have sex. The consequences are too great and when you are caught up in the moment, it is difficult to STOP and consider the consequences.

Information is powerful if you have the right information. This is Teen Pregnancy Prevention month and the end of the academic year just as we go into the summer months, talk to your children about making intelligent choices before they make a mistake.  There are many things to consider, like STD’s, HIV/AIDS, Herpes, Mono and the most severe consequence, an unwanted pregnancy.

Make sure you and your teens have the right information by doing the questions on the web sties dedicated to teen pregnancy prevention.Sit down with your teens and discuss the myths and misconceptions they may have about sex and relationships.

The follow questions are a sample of what is available online;

Myths About Getting Pregnant

MYTH: A girl can’t get pregnant/ a guy can’t get a girl pregnant if:
1.you have sex standing up
2.you have sex in a hot tub or a swimming pool
3.you jump up and down immediately after sex
4.It’s your first time
5.the girl pushes really hard on her belly button after sex;
6.the girl makes herself sneeze for fifteen minutes after sex

Get Serious about discussing the facts and don’t assume that they already.  It is a mistake to allow your teens get their information from misinformed teens like them.

This problem is everyone’s responsibility.

Check out the following web sites for more information.

http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/national/

http://www.seventeen.com/

http://www.stayteen.org/quiz/widget.aspx

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Advancing In God by Featured Author Karmen A Booker

May 13, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under global culture


by Featured Author Karmen A Booker

God’s desire is for us to grow.  This is clearly indicated through the Bible.  Some scriptures that reflect this are:

(II  Peter 3:18) But grow in grace and recognition and knowledge and understanding of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (the Messiah).  To him be all glory (honor, majesty and splendor) both now to the day of eternity.

(Ephesians 1:17) . . . the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, that He may grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him.

Hebrews 5:13-14 says:

Strong meat are principles that are beyond the foundational principles of the doctrine of Christ.

Hebrews 6:1-2 outlines these principles.  It reads:

Therefore, leaving the principles of the doctrine of Christ, let us go on unto perfection; not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works, and of faith toward God, of the doctrine of baptisms and of laying on of hands, and of resurrection of the dead, and of Eternal judgment.

The Greek word for “perfection” is telesphoreo, which means to be a hearer to completion; maturity.

God wants us to strive for maturity in the knowledge of Him.

How Do We Strive for Maturity?

By reading, studying, and meditating on the Word of God.  II Timothy 2:15 admonishes us to study.  It says:  Work hard so God can say to you, “Well done.”  Be a good workman, one who does not need to be ashamed when God examines your work.  Know what his Word says and means.

The Greek word for “spoudazo” means to make effort, be earnest, be diligent, labour.  So we must seek to make time to read the word with understanding, on a consistent basis.  We must be consistently consistent, not consistently inconsistsent.  It is not only important to read and study the Word of God, but to meditate on the Word of God.

Joshua 1:8 reads:  This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth, but thou shall meditate on it day and night, then thou shall have good success, and thou shalt make thy way prosperous.

The Hebrew word for meditate is “haw-gaq” which means to ponder; to think about carefully; deliberate.

After using the R=reading, S=studying, M=meditating method, we must obey the Word of God.  This requires:

A. Walking by Faith – Habbakuk 2:4; Hebrews 11:6

B.  Fulfilling our God-given obligation  Ecclesiastes 12:13; I Samuel 15:22

C. Walking in God’s footsteps – Jeremiah 7:23-24 and

II Thessalonians 2:15

When you attach yourself to God, you follow (obey) where he leads.   God becomes the leader, instead of you.  However, you can detach yourself from God by disobeying his Word.  Disobedience causes one to digress (go backward).  As long as you are going backward, you cannot walk forward.  The two directions are diametrically opposed.

Once you start going backwards, you open the door for Satan to wreak havoc in your life through deception and confusion. James 3:16 says:  For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.  However, there is a way to turn and go forward and get back on the straight and narrow path that leads to life – eternal life.  That way is REPENTANCE.

Benefits of Maturing in Christ Are

1.    Discernment between things of God and the things of the Devil.  I once heard a pastor say this on the radio, “Once you know the truth, you can recognize a lie.”

2.    Greater Revelation

3.     Wisdom

Definition of Wisdom

Wisdom is knowledge and understanding.  (Proverbs 2:6 and Proverbs 1:5 and 7)

Purpose of Wisdom

  • To be able to walk uprightly in honor to God.  God is pleased and greatful when you follow His commandments (Proverbs 4:5-6 an Benefits of Wisdom are

  • Avoid a lot of problems and negativity in your life by making right choices

  • Bless other people through the wisdom you have gained through counseling and praying with others.

  • Help others to change their lives.

Continue to Seek Wisdom

A.   Stay on the straight and narrow path that leads to righteousness and peace.  If you don’t you’ll veer off the path, and on to the path of darkness, that leads to much trouble and total destruction.  (Matthew 7:13-14)

B.    Seek wisdom like you would a hidden treasure.  Keep searching until you find it, and once you do, apply it in your life daily.  (Proverbs 8:10-11 and Proverbs 4:7)

NOTE:  All scriptures are taken from the Amplified Version of the Bible.

Karmen A. Booker has been called by God to exhort and teach others the Word of God.  She is the founder of Wings of Love Ministries (WOLM), which is a teaching and evangelist ministry whose vision is to encourage and inspire people to accept and commit their lives to Jesus Christ so their lives will be transformed into righteousness, and they will experience unceasing love, joy, and peace.  WOLM offers resource products that are designed to encourage you to grow in your personal relationship with Jesus Christ and take you to higher spiritual heights of knowledge and understanding of the Word of God!!!

Please Request Your Catalog by contacting us at: Wingsoflove8@yahoo.com www.empowerment-thru-entrepreneurship.net

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PRO”s “Performance Rights Organizations” regulate Urban Radio

May 12, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under entertainment


j0428507Black radio is the most significant channel of urban culture and family values in the African American community.

It serves as an important source of news for black families from the black perspective and entertainment for audiences in every ethnic group. Everyone listens to black radio for the drama and buffoonery and to catch up on hot topics.

A rally to “Save Black Radio” is scheduled to take place May 13 in front of Rep. John Conyers (D-MI) office in Detroit.

Representative Conyers is an 80-year-old African American congressman who is the sponsor of the Performance Rights Act.

The Performance Rights was originally introduced in February earlier this year designed to collect royalties on local radio for airplay. Commercial radio will have to pay the same fees as Satellite radio.

In a segment on the Tom Joyner Morning Show with Roland Martin and Cathy Hughes, she said that during a meeting in Conyers’ office with opponents of the measure, the congressman “turned up his CD player so loud that we could not hear anyone talk … It was turned up to teenage volume.”

It is unbelievable that a Senator would stoop to such a tactic as to turn up the volume on CD player in the middle of a meeting to avoid hearing what citizens have to say about legislation that affects so many others.

The following is a excerpt from theUS House of Representatives Committee on the Judiciary  Press Release February 04, 2009 http://judiciary.house.gov/news/090204.html

The legislation would amend an inequity in America’s copyright law that exempts over-the-air broadcasters from paying those who perform the music that we listen to on AM and FM radio. Webcasters, satellite radio providers and cable companies are presently required to pay for music they broadcast.

“All those in the creative chain of musical production – the artists, musicians, and others who enrich us culturally – deserve to be justly compensated for their work,” said Conyers. “We have introduced the Performance Rights Act to ensure fairness so that any service that plays music pays those who create and own the recordings – just as satellite, cable and internet radio stations currently do. Working with the Senate, I hope that Congress may act quickly to pass this important legislation to level the playing field between different technologies and ensure rightful compensation to performers.

What is going on? Why are they trying to destroy the one medium that is really the pulse of the black community?

Radio is not only about the music; it speaks the same language and conveys the message in the way that it can be heard effectively by those that choose to tune in.

When I was a child black radio was a rare jewel in the community and served to bridge the gap in communication where communities were cut off or excluded from mainstream media.

As Cathy Hughes stated, it is the responsibility of the record executives and companies to pay the individuals that sing or perform in any way on a song why should the radio stations pay residuals anyone other than the writers who hold the copyright to the song?

Performance royalties are tracked and paid out by the performance rights organizations like ASCAP, BMI, SESAC, and SoundExchange.

The royalty process begins once a song is registered with one of the three performing rights organizations.

Once a song is registered, it becomes part of that PRO’s (performing rights organization) collection and is available to all of its users. Most of those users have a “blanket license” to use any or all of the PRO’s music, however some users license on a per program basis and only pay for the music they actually use.

The PROs  performing rights organizations deduct money for their operating expenses and the rest goes to the songwriters and publishers.

Every since the writers strike in the television industry people have become greedy and money driven about how much money they are not getting through every available medium.  It is my understanding that when you agree legally to participate in producing music you cross your “i’s” and dot your “t’s” to ensure your compensation.

What happened to fuel this performance tax and why does someone like Conyers have an axe to grind with urban radio? Who has been affected by this that it has become another form of racism to black radio?

While the resolution will be framed in terms of preventing a ‘tax,’ ‘fee,’ or ‘burden’ on local radio stations, in reality, the only payment broadcasters would be required to make would be for the use of someone else’s property.” http://hiphopnews.yuku.com/topic/1015

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“Missing The Mark” by Featured Author Karmen A Booker

May 11, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under global culture


by Featured Author Karmen A Booker

The (Greek) word for sin is “harmartano”, which means to miss the mark not share in the prize); to err due to faults; offend; trespass.

The (Hebrew) word for sin is “chata”, which means to miss; forfeit; lack; to cause to lead astray.

When a person sins, they miss the mark.  That is, they miss the blessings of love, joy, peace, and fulfillment that come with obeying God’s Word.

In I Timothy 3:16, it says that “all scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.” Therefore, the Word of God is your Instruction Book for Life.  It leads and guides you along life’s journey.  “Your Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light to my path.”

(Psalm 119:105)

The key to this powerful Instruction Book for Life is that you must have faith in it.  Faith means more than just believing. It means totally trusting, depending upon and being confident (assured) of the Word of God.

(In John 1:1), it says that “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was God, and the Word was with God Himself.” He was present originally with God.  All things were made and came into existence through Him; and without Him was not even one thing made that has come into being.  In Him was Life, and the Life was the Light of men.

God admonishes us to love the Lord (Word) with all your heart, mind, and soul.  We show that we love the Lord (Word) by obeying it.  “. . . obey His voice according to all that I command you today, you and your children, with all your mind and heart and with all your being.” (Deuteronomy 30:2) We should not just be hearers of the Word, but doers also. (James 1:22)

When you obey the Word of God, you live a life of prosperity, good success, and wisdom.

“This book of the law shall not depart out of my mouth, but I shall meditate on it day and night, that you may observe and do according to all that is written in it.  For then you shall make your way prosperous, and then you shall deal wisely and have good success.”

(Joshua 1:8)

“So everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts upon them (obeying them) will be like a sensible man who builds his house upon the rock.” (Matthew 7:24)

Another key to the Instruction Book of Life having operation in your life and yielding results is to deny your will and emotions.  You must deny your desires (to sleep in rather than go to church), emotions

(to maintain anger rather than forgive), and will (work a job, rather than start the business God wants you to start), and Make a Decision to Follow God’s Will.

You must deny the self life – self seeking; self pleasing, self confidence, and self satisfaction.   You must be liberated from the self life.  Only then, will you be able to experience the fullness of God – the abundant life that comes from reading, studying, and meditating and applying the Word of God in your life.  Thereby, pleasing and glorifying God.

The denial of self is a daily process that requires a daily decision of denying self and accepting God’s will for your life.  Your life will be constantly renewed (changed) to conform to God’s way (attitude, emotions, and actions) of living.  As your mind is renewed and your actions conform to the Word of God, then you will experience love, joy and peace and good success.

God desires for his children to enjoy life on an ongoing basis.  Not just 3 years, 5 years, or 10 years, but throughout their life.

“I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance to the full, till it overflows.” (John 10:10)

“The Lord is my strength and my impenetrable Shield:  my heart trusts in, relies on, and confidently leans on Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song will I praise Him. The Lord is their (unyielding) Strength, and He is the Stronghold of salvation to His anointed.” (Psalm 28:7-8)

Karmen A. Booker has been called by God to exhort and teach others the Word of God.  She is the founder of Wings of Love Ministries (WOLM), which is a teaching and evangelist ministry whose vision is to encourage and inspire people to accept and commit their lives to Jesus Christ so their lives will be transformed into righteousness, and they will experience unceasing love, joy, and peace.  WOLM offers resource products that are designed to encourage you to grow in your personal relationship with Jesus Christ and take you to higher spiritual heights of knowledge and understanding of the Word of God!!!

Please Request Your Catalog by contacting us at: Wingsoflove8@yahoo.com www.compuperfect.net

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Honoring Mama, Don’t just give lip service, mean it and demonstrate it

May 10, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under Kitchen Table Wisdom


“The wind beneath our wings so we can soar the greatest heights of our capability” that is what a mother does. She teaches us to trust our ability not just to fly, to soar!

What are you doing in your life right now this very minute that reflects what you learned from your mother? The values that you live by are the one you learned from whoever raised you.

How did you turn out as a fully functioning adult living, loving and learning making a positive contribution to the world?

Family values will always be the most important to mothers because it determines what kind of citizen did you turned out to be. Mothers want to raise individuals that become great leaders and people that do positive things that leave an impact on the world.

Mothers will always keep the light on for you and pray that you are protected in all things. Where else can you get a warm clean place to sleep with access to cable and the internet not to mention hot meals and free laundry for little or nothing?

It is a mother’s mission in life to provide safety, energy and possibility for her babies, her offspring, her seed and the many other children she nurtures that are not hers.

You are the person that she carried safely in her body and gave birth to; her energy assisted in your arrival to the earth realm because you survived birth; once you are here the possibility of your life and all that you are destined to become is what the journey of motherhood is all about.

Whatever the circumstances may be, your mother provided an opening for your arrival to the life you have inherited or created. You can’t blame anyone for what you are doing or not doing to soar.

What happens between you and your mother is a phenomenon because it is not only through a birth connection that a mother/child relationship develops.

The mother connection in your life can be a surrogate mother figure that could even be your father or another kinship connection. An older sibling, an auntie, grandparent, or a non-related person that gives you advice can act as you mother figure.

If a parent is missing in our lives, we look naturally to others that fill the parental role. We have been taught how to parent ourselves from the parent of a childhood friend or guardian in a foster home. Someone, somewhere in our lives has shown us a parental connection.

The tragedy of not having a mother connection creates a disturbing life crisis and disconnect from family values which for some wreaks havoc on relationships.

Not learning to develop a true connection with your mother gives you no reference to how to create a connection with another person.

How many people have blamed mistakes on their past experiences at the hands of their mother for the acts they commit as adults?

Motherhood is a journey into the unknown realm with no road map and no instructions based on pure faith driven by love and complete devotion.

When you celebrate mothers remember to be forgiving for any mistakes you believe that your mother made. Remember she did her best while she was still growing and becoming a whole person in her own way.

Many mothers today suffer from illness and depression due to self neglect, stress and uncontrollable circumstances. No mother wants to be a burden to her family.

The person that was the backbone of your family that made daily sacrifices for your comfort and well-being may need you now.  Be available, be open, and be honest in honoring your mother.

Don’t just give lip service, mean it and demonstrate it.

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Seven ways to celebrate family when times are hard

May 6, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under art of living


Family Reunions will be extra special this year with so much to celebrate!  Yes we do have a lot to celebrate because we have all been through some tough times financially and all we have left is to cherish our family ties.

Everyone is holding it together the best way they can by cutting back and making adjustments in the way we live. We can’t take anything for granted anymore!

Jobs disappear, companies downsize and even close, people have lost their homes and unemployment is not making ends meet.

Well what is there to celebrate?

The reason to celebrate our family values and connections is the reason why we work to have a life that we can share with someone. The most important someone is family. Why do we want to survive? It is all about family, whether it’s a blood relation or a family connection created out of circumstance.

Unless you are living in this world completely alone and isolated from everyone, your reason for living is for your family.

Sure they drive you nuts and get on your bad side more often than you want to admit, hell they may even be completely dysfunctional and you must ask yourself, “inst it great that somebody loves you?”

We all desire to be loved and cherished by someone because we do not live in this world alone. We come from a family, a group of people that ties us to this existence here in this world. Nothing can replace or duplicate that.

So what can we do to celebrate if there is an economic crisis and we have lost almost everything?

We can become creative and discuss different ways of connecting even if we cannot be together in the same place. Here are some suggestions;

1. Make group phone calls, on specific days every week with a different group of family members. Hearing each other’s voice and getting caught up is soothing and strengthens the connection.

2. Utilize technology through online cameras and programs like Skype to stay in touch and see each other’s face. Seeing each other’s face gives you some comfort that the persons you don’t see frequently are really okay.

3. Join a site to exchange pictures and other information about events like births, school projects, birthdays, anniversaries, travel photos, awards, etc. Keeping up with the events in your daily lives helps the miles to disappear.

4. Set times to pray together and be of the same mind for the safe keeping and well-being of your families. Send out an email to each other that you would like to be in prayer with them at a set time of the day.

5. When a family member is ill and cannot travel, put your money together and send the one family member that is available to go to visit that person. A visit from a family member when there is a health crisis or any crisis is comforting and healing to the Spirit.

6. Write letters or send cards, not electronic cards, real paper and pen letters or cards written by you. The onslaught of technology had made us lazy about writing and using snail mail. It is still a great feeling to get a letter in the mail.

7. Send actual pictures in the mail of the children and of yourself. Everything is on the computer nowadays and it is not the same as having an actual picture to display with the family group of pictures that you will see every day. This keeps the people you love close to you because you think of them whenever you see the picture.

There are alternatives to having a family reunion if a lack of finances is the issues or being able to travel is a hindrance to getting everyone together.

It is vitally important to keep family ties strong all the time and especially when times are tough. Don’t try to carry your burdens all alone, that is what family is for to share the load.

Cherish you family even if they are far away.

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Seven Tips for Making the Best of Being Fired or Laid Off

April 20, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under Kitchen Table Wisdom


If you’re sitting at home and feeling like the world is coming to an end because you have been fired, layed-off or squeezed out somehow of the job you were just beginning to sort of like.

It is painful and your ego is bruised so you spend some time feeling sorry for yourself and being angry.  This is not a good time in America to lose your job!

The stories are depressing and is seems that there is no hope for the economy to recover any time soon. This is the time to get creative with the ideas you have been toying with and never had the time to implement.

You are determined to make the best of this opportunity to do what you have always wanted to do which is to start a web site, or write a book, or become an entrepreneur, perhaps even go back to school or enroll in school for the first time in your life.

You have gone over several hundred times questioning how you ended being the one with no job, one paycheck away from being homeless.  Not you! Not you the planner, the insightful one, the one who is disciplined and does everything with purpose.

Well here you are, you can beat yourself up and live in what Iyanla calls “high gear fear” or you can redefine your circumstances and take control of your destiny.

The purpose of this article is to empower you so you will not find anything here about living in fear should you decide to continue reading. If you are saying yes to never being put into this position again of being fired or layed off, you are about to begin a new journey.

Just to get this out of the way, if you have decided or chosen to sleep late and only put in a minimal effort like a few hours a day working on your goals and redefining your life then this is not for you.

Notice I said decided or has chosen to sleep late. Every behavior is a choice or decision consequently if sleeping is more important to you at this point I encourage you to re-evaluate your intentions and your reaction to not having a job.

No disrespect, you are just not ready with that kind of behavior to seriously change your destiny.  It will take some self examination to determine what your response means. Sleeping could be a sign of mild depression.

Given that possibility or that you finally want to take the opportunity to get as much rest as you can before you find another job.

With that being said there are some important things you need to know before you begin this journey.

Just follow these five tips for making the best of being fired or layed off as a point of departure as you begin the journey to make your dreams come true.

1.  An important factor when you start to make the best of being fired or layed off is saying out loud that you believe you deserve all the best in life.

The reason why this is important is because it prevents you from defining yourself by the details being unemployed.  If you don’t believe you deserve all the best in life, then you run the risk of not being able to receive when good things begin to show up in your life.

2. Another important consideration for making the best of being fired or layed off is to set up a work space where you can put yourself in the correct state of mind to work.

It’s critical that you set up a work space because it conveys the message that you are in work mode. Sit in front of your computer and write, research, prepare a business plan, look at the licensing requirements for your business is important to discipline your focus.

3. When you decide make the best of being fired or layed off the misconception is that family members will support your efforts of casually surfing the internet playing games, shopping, or amusing yourself as working on your goals.

Try explaining that to the bill collectors or family member that may be supporting you while you make the transition and recover from how the recession is affecting you.  Get a grip, if you are over the age of 18, no one should be supporting for longer than 60 to 90 days if they can afford it.

Many times we take advantage of family members that have income and allow them to pay the bills while we lick our wounds and fake like we are trying hard to support ourselves. This lacks integrity, which is not a great character trait to develop as a business owner.

4. Instead of complicating your efforts to make the best of being fired or layed off, take the time to be honest with yourself and your family members.  Talk with them about how much time you can realistically be supported without making a contribution to the household.

If it is not possible for you to live with family without a contribution at all, don’t become a sponge keep your self respect in proper perspective and truly make a sincere effort to do your part at home while you look for ways to generate income. You will find that there is less tension if you do the dishes in the sink or take out the trash without being asked.

5. What you need to do now is create a routine that will keep you on track depending on what industry you take on, whether it is starting a blog, writing a book, becoming an entrepreneur, or going to school.

So if you really want to make the most being fired of layed off this the opportunity of a life time to do the things you have always wanted to do. After you have wallowed for an appropriate amount of time and whined about how unfair life is, get busy and start redefining you.

6.  Utilize the skills that come natural to you and what have learned from your last place of employment or other jobs. Make an assessment what was functional and efficient about the operations, not the behavior of the people.

Your skills and abilities can benefit you in organizing your blog, book, or business and even help you decide what to focus on in a degree program.  Do what you are good at because the motivation will com naturally and you will enjoy doing whatever tasks are necessary to achieve making the best of being fired or layed off.

7.  Don’t get discouraged, creating a business takes time so be prepared to work harder for yourself than you did when you worked for someone else.

The reality is that the operations of a business are the most important step in making a reality. This is not a get rich quick scheme, it will be rewarding only if you put in the work.

Follow these tips to as a starting point. Keep it simple and go one step at a time. Don’t skip through the process, as the African proverb states; “Eat the elephant one bite at a time”.

The elephant is in the room and no one wants to talk about it.

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March for the animals in Druid Hill Park and make a Pledge

April 17, 2009 by omitunde  
Filed under education


09marchlogoThe March for the Animals is The Maryland SPCA’s largest annual fundraiser, attracting thousands and thousands of participants (along with their furry companions!) Featuring a 1.5 mile walk, pet costume contests and other activities, an agility course for dogs, obedience demos, a “flealess” market of pet-friendly vendors, adoptable animals from The Maryland SPCA and other local rescues, games, prizes and much, much more, the March for the Animals is fun for the whole family!
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I’m Rojo! The Coolest Dog on the Block!

I am walking with my favorite person Debbi  and all of my other animal friends Sunday, April 19th, 2009 9:00 A.M. Come on out for a fun day in the park.

This is my neighbor ROJO  (RED) and we are asking that you go to the Maryland SPCA web page to make a donation because he is so cool. He protects the building and even brings in my recycling bin when he sees it on the sidewalk.

Make a pledge online at this link  March for the Animals

Or Join us in beautiful Druid Hill Park!

MapQuest Directions to Druid Hill Park

Schedule of Events, See you at the Park!

Walk-a-thon Registration 4/19/2009 9:00 am – 1:30 pm
Starting Line ceremonies with Duff Goldman from “Ace of Cakes” 4/19/2009 10:00 am
1.5 mile Walk-a-thon 4/19/2009 10:00 am – 2:00 pm
Pet costume contest and “Most Mysterious Heritage” contest registration 4/19/2009 10:00 am – 11:15 am
Mid-Atlantic Disc Dogs Demonstration 4/19/2009 11:00 am – 12:00 pm
Training Tips by experienced SPCA dog trainer! Two 20-minute sessions. 4/19/2009 11:00 am – 12:00 pm
Have some fun on the Agilty Course! Courtesy of Oriole Dog Training Club 4/19/2009 10:00 am – 1:30 pm
Musical Chairs – a great chance to practice the “Sit” command with your dog! 4/19/2009 10:00 am – 2:00 pm
Pet Communicator, Terri Diener of PetSpeak available for private consultations (limit 20 people or pets) 4/19/2009 10:30 am – 1:30 pm
Micro-chip your pet 4/19/2009 10:00 am – 2:00 pm
Contest Judging with Celebrity Judges. Prizes courtesy of dogma and Wisdom Panel MX. 4/19/2009 11:30 am – 1:00 pm

All donations go directly to provide care, shelter, food, spay/neuter and medication to the animals in our adoption center.

Your donations enable us to operate our adoption center, which places more than 3,000 pets a year into loving homes.

With no government funding or money from national animal welfare organizations, The March for the Animals raises critical funds needed to care for the animals while they await their new homes.

The Maryland SPCA. 1869 – 2009. Dedicated to improving the lives of animals for 140 years.

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